I will make it out! I think.

The days have been far too long, and the nights far too short. I suppose this is part and parcel of life as a straight-A student (I'm serious! My results of late have been awesome. Amaths, emaths, bio, chem, physics, english, whatever. You name it baby ;D). I'm feeling a bit burned out by all that I've been doing the past 2 weeks. I will probably get used to this if I keep this up long enough, but I think the question that I must answer when I return to East Coast Park for the first time in a month, later tonight is: Am I willing to put everything else aside, and focus 100% on my studies? I have never been about fantastic results and entire afternoons buried in textbooks. I wonder if I can convince myself to stay on this path all the way through to the O levels. Already, my new study programme has cost me a part of my life; now I only play piano about 4 hours a week, and I only get to play on weekends. This is compared to the 14 hours or so I used to spend on the piano, drilling away on the keys or composing something interesting. I don't think I will be able to live without my dear instrument much longer!

The human mind (or rather, the mind of Keith Ang, since I don't know what passes through you guys' brains daily. Although I certainly can know if I want to :P) is a complex thing indeed! Life is extremely simple now. I think I'm now living the life of a normal teenager. Cajole around with friends, study hard, cajole around with friends more, study harder, have fun, go home and feel happy. But... I don't know. I find life increasingly one-dimensional. It is no longer the dizzying hall of mirrors, and I haven't felt lost in a long time, but now I find life far too linear. Like.. the road is so smooth and mapped out! Where's the fun in an existence that presents no challenge bah. I hope I can find a solution to this problem when I go back to my usual spot along the beach at East Coast Park later on. I'm looking forward to it because returning there reminds me of a recent event which already feels surprisingly distant. Ironic that that same event was the reason why I stopped visiting ECP at night in the first place. Heh.

Neural overload is bad for the soul!