Ouroboros

Heh. I used to think ACS reciprocated at least a bit... I guess I thought wrong! People learn from their mistakes I guess, so I'm just going to learn from mine, then dust myself off and get back to life. I don't know if it would just be a temporal sort of thing, but the kind of responses I've been getting recently... something tells me I should stop trying. I'm not blaming anyone for feeling down because some shit happened, but the way I've been.... bruised(?), I think... at the very least I need some time away from ACS. I don't think I have the capacity to be a very nice person after these 2 days. Yeah... It's unusually shortsighted of me... I mean it's just been 2 days(like literally 2 days, not figuratively "a couple of days") ACS has been like that, but I'm especially demoralized and... dare I say I'm hurt?

Other than the above, today was a pleasantly nondescript day. Piano. breakfast, a game of Dota(I haven't touched computer games for crazy long, and I really had nothing else to do, so I guess it was alright), read SS textbook, nap, 5km. I was supposed to hit the gym with Anderson this morning but heavy rain and us BOTH waking up late meant that we had to call it off. At least I got in some exercise anyway. Oh, and I skipped lunch because I try not to eat lunch when my day is extremely sedentary (like today). Well, I guess a manage a bit if my parents try to force the issue, but I'm not big on eating when I'm not hungry, you know? I think it's quite pointless to be eating simply because you are "supposed to", honestly.

In fact, I think it's quite pointless to be doing anything simple because you are "supposed to". For example, if you don't have anything to say to the half-acquaintance next to you, then just pretend he/she doesn't exist! I think it's quite stupid to try and be "polite"(especially when you don't have any genuine intention to be polite - you're just doing what you think you're "supposed to"), and do a half-assed attempt at acknowledging his/her presence, then proceed to maintain an awkward silence the whole way. Then, to break the monotony, you say some lines off the list of lines you have in your head, because you're "supposed to" say something. Sigh.

It's just plastic, it's very annoying sometimes, because the person you're talking to - wait - "supposed to" be talking to probably isn't a idiot and he/she will simply hear in you a robot operated by this insidious clockwork, ticking away to the dull mechanics of societal niceties. Honestly, of course people like to interact and it's great to have a lot to talk about to everyone, but do you really want people to think of you in that manner?

Alright point made I guess. Now, about a certain someone.....

Heh. I used to think ACS reciprocated at least a bit... I guess I thought wrong! People learn from their mistakes I guess, so I'm just going to learn from mine, then dust myself off and get back to life. I don't know if it would just be a temporal sort of thing, but the kind of responses I've been getting recently...

(Go look up the title of this post on Wikipedia. Read the post as many times as you like :P)